Kokoro Connect, Volume 5 by Sadanatsu Anda

Author:Sadanatsu Anda [ANDA, SADANATSU]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: J-Novel Club
Published: 2019-05-06T00:00:00+00:00

—I failed the entrance exam for my first choice high school.

It wasn’t my fault, though. I mean, yes, it was the best public school in the district, but I scored an 80 on all the practice tests, so clearly I had the ability. No, I was just unlucky. After all, I know at least one guy at my cram school who passed, and he’s basically a neanderthal compared to me.

And so I ended up enrolling at my second choice, Yamaboshi High School. As far as private prep schools went, it was fairly decent, and I’d heard the overall vibes were pretty lax. This did little to spark my enthusiasm, however, and so I was a sad little rain cloud, right from day one. How fitting, I thought to myself.

But just when I was getting ready to settle into my new, unexceptional life, things took a turn for the weird when a series of coincidences all hit me at once.

Or maybe none of it was a coincidence at all; maybe it was a foregone conclusion.

The people I met in that room were so full of light, it hurt. So dazzling, they made me sick.

Every now and then I’d meet people like them: beacons shining pointlessly amid a world full of despair. But in the end, they’d typically end up like us, and the world would grow more and more tainted. That was the system working as intended.

But every once in a blue moon, there were exceptions—people blessed with good luck right from birth. I always wondered what would become of those people... and why it was that I saw them as “dazzling” to begin with. The mystery intrigued me.

Maybe if I found the answer, I could join them—

No, no, no. What am I thinking? Am I blind? No way that’s happening.

But I’m still curious... Yeah, that’s it. I’m just curious. That’s all there is to it.

I don’t want to be like them, that’s for sure. No, really.

◆◇◆

—Starting my first year of high school, I wanted to reinvent myself. Like a makeover! Yeah, I like the sound of that.

Of course, I didn’t fancy myself the queen bee or anything. I knew I wasn’t cut out for that. Still, I don’t think it hurts to dream a little, you know?

I don’t need to be the star, I thought to myself. I don’t need to be in the limelight. I’ll take any minor role you offer me, even just Villager A!

But that motivation quickly faded, and before I knew it, I was right back where I’d always been. Literally the same exact spot! And at this point, I’m starting to think this is where I’ll always be. This is the role I’ve been assigned. I get that, I promise.

I’m just a peg, and this is my hole. My world won’t change—it’s just not possible. I mean, it’s just so big, you know? Compared to the size of the world, I’m an itty-bitty molecule. A speck of dust that floats along, fated never to take center stage.

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